265. Random Thought #8

desk-sleep

I cannot think of what to write,

So maybe I just shouldn’t.

I cannot be dark or bright;

My heart just isn’t in it.

I cannot think of what to write,

So here’s this pointless poem.

Can’t express what I see in sight,

Or write it in this tome…

(I just want to go home).

I cannot think of what to write.

I’ll close my eyes instead;

Wait for the dongs past the hours’ height,

To lift my sleepy-head…

(*yawn*)…I just want to go back to bed….

K. Aldaya, 3/20/14

Picture:  Artist Unknown; http://xosarah.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/01/desk-sleep.png

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264. The Most Life-Like Zombie Survival Game Ever

It’s so dark in here;

And cold…yes, it’s so cold.

Won’t someone turn on the light?

I cannot see the zombies,

But I’m ready to fight.

Fight for life and limb,

Or run and run some more.

Can’t stop or I won’t survive.

I have to get out of here…

Get out of here alive.

Shhhh…Quiet! I hear….

Close by they are walking.

I will hold my breath and wait.

I do not hear them now, so…

There’s no more time to wait!

Look there! An exit!

Afraid, but there’s no choice.

I pull myself together,

I’m so close….and I….

Open to the weather.

It’s dark outside too.

Though, no time to ponder.

I keep on running….nowhere;

What is the point of it all?

If I live will someone care?

Will they care that I….

I’m surrounded by death?

Care if I’m eaten alive?

Or will they join the feast too?

Laughing:  “She was too weak to survive!”

I have stopped too long.

I race to the forest.

Gasping: run and run….and stop.

At my feet the waters’ edge.

I crouch to sip a drop.

lake

My hands reach….but what?

What is that down in the deep?

There is an eerie figure.

I step back and I weep.

Crack. Crunch. Sounds behind.

The zombies! They’ve returned!

I wipe my eyes; turn and gasp!

You are not a zombie…no…

Reality I grasp.

“Hello”, zombie says.

(the zombie: in disguise)

“Hi”, I reply, and it smiles.

A human smile….deep and warm;

A smile…it’s been awhile.

I can’t believe it!

Do my eyes see the truth?

It moves in close and closer.

Surely, it is just like me?

Nothing bad will occur.

I reach out to touch,

And as my hand rises,

It pushes me with fury.

Backward I fall and I sink;

And kick in a flurry.

I am such a fool!

To believe it wouldn’t hurt me.

I can see it’s hateful grin,

But wait, can’t reach the surface!

I look–it is my twin.

Blacker than the black,

It washes into me.

I drown and when I wake: see,

The being on the surface is…

Human, not a zombie!

There were no zombies.

Ran all my life from them;

Was easier to pretend,

They were monsters than to know,

That sorrow in the end.

Sorrow of dying….

Sorrow from rejection.

Terror of being hunted….

Devoured without reason;

And everyday confronted….

…with just trying to survive.

K. Aldaya, 3/18/14

Picture:  Photographer Unknown; http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_rOEpjOA3UuM/TSUY3XGnkwI/AAAAAAAAB1Y/ZhI8tTXj7v8/s1600/IMG_4003.jpg

263. The Sphere

Foggy and groggy.

The day is,

Unsure; a blur.

Will the light stir,

And wake me?

c22977e4ecef54f85dd0aa1b6114bd4a

Laggy and saggy.

The mind is,

Weary; dreary…

Seconds:  leery,…

Of the time.

Sleepy and weepy.

The heart is,

Frigid, and hid,…

Inside, amid,…

The silence.

Broken; unspoken.

The soul is,

Hiding; residing,

In depths abiding,…

With the past.

Complex, the apex,

Of living is.

To thrive, alive,

Through death we strive,…

To find hope.

Detached and snatched.

The day is,

So near.  Not here.

Will it appear,

And wake me,..

From this frozen sphere,…of fear?

K. Aldaya, 3/6/14

Picture: By: Hiroko Matsubara: http://www.hirokomatsubara.com; http://media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/236x/c2/29/77/c22977e4ecef54f85dd0aa1b6114bd4a.jpg

262. Mommy, Don’t Leave Me

sadness

Mommy, please don’t leave me,

I’m afraid to be alone.

I fear the darkness coming.

Please don’t leave me alone!

Mommy, I’m so afraid,

Of the shadows which follow…

Follow me, and haunt my dreams.

I feel so cold; hollow.

Mommy, I feel it’s near.

Terrified I cringe and shake.

Please don’t look at me that way….

Like I am a mistake.

Mommy, I am sorry.

Sorry I’m a haunted soul.

That you can’t stand to look at,

My sin as black as coal.

Mommy, please hold my hand.

Do not let it go and leave.

It’s coming…yes it’s coming!

There’s no more time to grieve.

Mommy, don’t go away.

I’m so afraid and I see…

A dark form is near…..so near,

I feel death’s here mommy.

Mommy, mommy, help me!

It has me…I scream and scream,

But you don’t seem to hear me.

I scream and scream…and scream.

Mommy, why did you leave?

I step and walk to you now,

And you take my bloody hand.

Mommy, can’t you see now…

How hard it is for me to stand?

Mommy, I’m so tired.

Goodnight.  I wish I could stay,

But the dead do not walk strong,

In the light of a new day.

Mommy, it is so cold;

I can’t feel your warmth at all,

And I walk when I should sleep,

Beneath the night-moons’ pall.

Mommy, I am lonely.

Endlessly walking this path.

Can I sleep forever now?

Mommy, run my blood-bath.

You won’t miss me anyhow.

K. Aldaya, 3/3/14

Picture:  Artist Unknown; http://thedarkrosejournal.files.wordpress.com/2013/01/sadness.jpg

261. Use Me

alone-girl-sad-crying-broken-heart-love-cute-beauty

I will not cry because it will get me nowhere.

Yep, what a waste of time to care;

To care for myself or my feelings.

After all, no one could less care.

It’s best to pretend that everything is okay.

Keep smiling and acting that way.

No one wants to be ’round a downer,

And I don’t matter anyway.

“Just do what you’re told and make everyone happy”.

I’m sure you will nod and agree.

I’m not capable of ‘happy’, right?

It’s too late, far too late, for me.

I will not cry because it will get me nowhere.

Yep, what a waste of time to care;

Care for myself or my sorry life.

That’s right, use my life. I don’t care.

……..Wasn’t using it anyway.

K. Aldaya, 2/28/14

Picture:  Photographer Unknown; http://lovepicturex.blogspot.com/2012/12/alone-girl-sad-crying-broken-heart-love-cute-beauty.html

260. To Be a Tree

TGraphic_com-Full-Nature-tree-sunset

I wonder what it’s like to be a tree?

To be rooted in the earth?

To be part of it?

Important from birth?

A vital spirit?

I wonder what it’s like to have a home?

To serenely be drinking,

Acceptance by soil?

Not one time thinking,

Of leaving to toil?

I wonder what it’s like to be a tree?

To firmly flow with time on?

Unshakable; strong.

Tree? What’s it like at dawn…..

…to belong?

K. Aldaya, 2/27/14

Picture: Photographer Unknown; http://www.tgraphic.com/userimages/Gallery/Nature/TGraphic_com-Full-Nature-tree-sunset.jpg